Why that overwhelmed part of you needs attention, not rejection

Have you ever had a big emotional reaction that seemed way out of proportion to what was happening?

Maybe your partner didn’t text back and you felt a flood of abandonment.

Maybe a coworker corrected you, and suddenly you felt ashamed, small, or panicked.

Maybe you received good news — and felt like you didn’t deserve it.

These moments often aren’t about the present. They’re a signal that your younger self — the part of you that once had to figure out how to survive — is showing up.

And instead of pushing that part away, therapy helps you turn toward it with care.

Who Is Your “Younger Self”?

Your younger self is the emotional imprint of who you once were: a child or adolescent who developed beliefs about the world, love, worth, safety, and self-expression — often before you had the words or support to make sense of it.

This part of you may carry:

• Fear of abandonment or not being “good enough”
• A need to please, perform, or stay invisible to feel safe
• Beliefs like “I’m too much,” “I don’t matter,” or “Love has to be earned”

These aren’t flaws. They’re protective adaptations. And they make perfect sense given what you lived through.

Why Soothing Your Younger Self Matters

Without awareness, these younger parts tend to run the show. They influence your:

• Reactions in relationships
• Self-worth and internal dialogue
• Ability to set boundaries or receive care

When they’re triggered, it’s not logic that’s needed — it’s emotional attunement.

Learning how to soothe your younger self gives you the tools to:

• Calm your nervous system in real time
• Rebuild inner trust and safety
• Make decisions from your grounded, adult self — not your past pain

This isn’t about becoming your own therapist. It’s about being the emotionally safe presence you didn’t always have.

What Soothing Looks Like

In therapy, we often use techniques such as:

• Guided imagery (visualizing your younger self and offering comfort)
• Somatic grounding (placing your hand on your heart, breathing slowly, or wrapping yourself in a blanket)
• Dialogue work (writing or speaking kind words to your inner child)
• Boundary-setting (protecting the part of you that once felt helpless)

You might start by simply noticing when you feel small, reactive, or fearful — and asking:

“What does this part of me need right now?”

Soothing is not self-indulgent. It’s a re-parenting act of emotional responsibility.

Journal Prompts: Meeting Your Younger Self with Care

• When I feel overwhelmed, what age or version of me might be showing up?
• What was that version of me trying to protect or make sense of?
• What soothing words or gestures might they need from me now?
• If I could speak directly to my younger self, what would I say?

Closing Reflection

You are not weak for needing comfort.

You are not broken for having parts of yourself that still ache.

You are someone who is learning how to tend to old wounds with gentleness, not shame.

Soothing your younger self isn’t about fixing the past — it’s about changing your relationship to it. And in doing so, creating a present that feels safe enough to exhale into